Right there on the label below the name they've placed the word Genuine. It's authentic. Made from real ingredients. Not synthetic. It's full of things you can touch and feel.

When people surmise the press release is dead and needs a makeover, they point to the gimmicks. The press release needs a Technorati tag, a MP3 file, an iCal link, a camel hair, as if sprucing up a pig's ear makes it a purse. I don't intend this to be a critical review of the efforts of PR people looking to tap into social media, or on their current research. Nor is it an indictment of efforts to improve the conversation between talkers and listeners. I just think there's more to the demise of the press release than a need for a new package.

It is an indictment of poor writing.

Most press release start off as dull prater. For instance, I'll pick on a lead I wrote seven years ago: "Eighth Judicial District Court Chief Judge Gene Porter today announced the appointment of Michael Sommermeyer, a Texas Tech University media relations professional and former broadcast journalist, as the new Court Information Officer for the court system in Southern Nevada." A straight to the point, run-on sentence, that leads off a run-of-the-mill pat on the back.

Why would anyone care? It doesn't have any flavor. It doesn't provide anything that jumps out at you as special. It made me feel good, but I don't recall anyone publishing it. And frankly, why would they? (I should have written, "Boy wonder from the planet Krypton arrives to save us all," but that would have bordered on puffery.)

Here's a better one: "Clark County’s District Court has successfully initiated the court's first transcontinental trial in Department 17 by linking the courtroom with a remote site in Boston Mass. by video conference. The videoconferencing trial, presided over by Judge Stefany Miley, allows a bed-confined defendant to participate in the proceedings through a two-way video link using court cameras and the Internet." This lead intrigues the reader. They want to know more.

Good writing bounces off the page and improves the chances the press release will be read. After that, then worry about whether it will be dug on Digg or talked about on Twitter. If you want people to talk about your press release, do a better job of writing it. Be genuine: the good stuff will stand out and people will notice.

Next post: And then? How to Write to Persuade